Friday 9 September 2016

blind hope










I have noticed I only ask for advice when I am put in a situation where I have to face my fears. Commitment, my insecurities, and anything to do with my heart. I feel though I have had a particular story in my life unravel to deal with all these things in one big leap.
However one thing I noticed from all the advice given there was no hope to any of it. I am talking about matters of the heart people. Why is it when its something to do with an impossible situation and its something to do with heart, it is immediately given the cut your loses attitude. I give myself that advice too, I mentioned last time I cut things before they have even had a chance to bloom. I do that with my artwork too. Something I had crumpled up in the bin the day before I come back and see it was actually quite beautiful.  I just think being hopeful can only get you somewhere even if its not the destination you set out with, you are still moving. And focusing on one destination is controlling the situation, trying to make it perfect, and perfection isn't happiness.  I believe you got to have just blind hope that things will work out, not just in relationships but life generally. I am in the art business after all it has the most uncertain future I am running on blind hope.









Isamu Noguchi Garden Museum NY

Thursday 1 September 2016

harvest moon











It is my favourite month, new beginnings happen in September, its the cusp of seasons. And everything starts a new round from businesses to home life. There is so much energy right now, and the first time all year I was able to set my new moon wishes. Something clicked, blocks cleared and I knew what I really wanted, the clarity was there behind the barrier of fear. 
This new moon reading is to good not to share, from my favourite Laurence Spencer King. She tells you also how to do your new moon wishes. 









pinterest

in recent times










- two films coming out with rachel weisz who I have huge respect for as an actress. Denial and the light between oceans

- had the pleasure of meeting the two creatives behind forest and found. it is great to chat to people about ideas and the world you are in. even though the creative life is a lovely job to take on it is a business at the end of the day and its great to swap stories. Their studio is also in a custom made shed, which had so much character and life to it, my eyes were darting everywhere taking it all in. 

- put on a 25% discount on my etsy shop, not because my work needed a discount, because I wanted to say thank you to everyone supporting me. Type in THANKYOU at checkout to redeem voucher, its valid till the 7th of September. 

- i kept seeing pictures of my work floating around on pinterest which is wonderful, but sometimes not the best quality. Big prompt to me to set up a board with my work on it, with descriptions and good quality images. 

- free and native has written an excellent article about hormone imbalances








Georgia O'Keeffe. Black Lava Bridge, Hana Coast-No. I, 1939


Tuesday 30 August 2016

roots









I spent the bank holiday, swimming in rivers, walking through woods and fields and braving the seas current to feel the salty water. It was the medicine I needed very calming, as all the things I had in my pipeline this year has sort of gone off course, either postponed or hasn't worked. It has made me feel nervous to talk about things before its the final product set in stone. It is hard when things don't work out. I watched a programme about the colour white and Wedgwood tried 411 different glazes till he reached that perfect white. It all comes down to patience. 
However when is it time to throw in the towel? I have thrown out a whole laundry bag of towels this past week personal life and work life. I tend to either let things go on too long or not long enough, probably be my life long lesson finding the balance between the two. 
But there is nothing like spending time in nature where only goodness grows to clear your head, find your roots. Right now that is nature, freedom, spontaneity, and following your heart. 








martin szekely crystal stool

Wednesday 24 August 2016

evolution











I talk about working towards my next section of work, but actually I don't think the work is in sections. Instead it is a continuous section of work, my whole life will be a block of work. You don't just close one project and move on to the next, I find thats what you did at GCSE level. Instead it evolves. I hit a eureka moment yesterday, everything i have been doing has led me to this new style of painting. It feels so honest and true. You know that saying, 'everything happens for a reason', I believe having this break from the studio and continuously working and painting has made me step back and research. I have been writing down in a notebook everything I discover. getting back to the core looking at true artists like David Nash and Andy Goldsworthy who make art alongside nature. You see their studio it is so basic and some art is never seen its just out there existing. 
Every painting I have created so far has led me to the way I paint. The first painting of a flower looks so stiff to me now and I can barely look at it. But it was a process as I called my show 500 flowers the artists process. I had to paint so many to access that freedom I have now. 
But my new block of work will be created in smaller quantities focused on different areas of the land and I will travel across Britain going to specific areas to paint. I will start this in October when I have my studio and space to excel. Till now I will continue to create and practice. I am off to paint at Bayntun flowers as its dahlia season at the moment, which are wonderful to draw such proud plants. However I do feel this will be my last block of plant paintings that I will sell individually, as it wont suit the heart of what I am planning for next. 








llyn y fan fach, wales.

Monday 22 August 2016

in recent times










- working my way through all these art documentaries. My favourites are the ones presented by Dr James cook. 

- Grayson Perry Directors Cut. My favourite part is where he is looking forward to being an artist again. Not being consumed with other projects other than his own. I feel the same that everything is on hold for me at the moment like I am in a dormant winter period. 

- Rebecca Salter Japanese Woodcuts video on the Ra site made me want to get printing again. 

- Listening to Lisa Hannigans new album At Swim. Favourite songs: Fall and Snow.

- I really fancy sitting and do nothing lately just eating Doughnuts from Pippin and watching grand designs. 








sleeping cat - ruskin

Sunday 21 August 2016

trust








"I use the Pensieve. One simply siphons the excess thoughts from one's mind, pours them into the basin, and examines them at one's leisure. It becomes easier to spot patterns and links, you understand, when they are in this form."
Albus Dumbledore 
Right now I could really do with a pensieve, I have so much floating about in my mind. It is like all my ideas are balloons and I am trying to grab on to them before they float away. Its frustrating but it also makes me excited to get in my studio so I can start creating. The studio hasn't even got foundations yet as its been so stressful trying to get it sorted. I keep thinking am I building a shed or a mansion? Me being me I read into this as a sign for me not to continue with putting my shed on the land or doing it at all. Then I got a call from the farmer who is allowing me to build on his land, " Lucy your phone is awful I can't hear what you are saying but it doesn't matter, you have got to only hear what I am saying, and I am telling you that you need to trust me. You are going to be ok on my land. That is all." and he hung up the phone. 







aesme


Saturday 13 August 2016

of late










- Special Plants, is a nursery and garden. Was very inspired by this place, because of the design and planting. So much imagination. The building itself the garden is based around, is full of amazing mid century furniture and design. The owner is an architect and the wife does all the plants, great combination of talents. 

- spending hours looking at vessels for my pottery collaboration ( will explain in another post) . I am in love with egyptian and roman pots. The colours are so warm, with their pastel paints they used to decorate. 

- lots of documentary watching this week:

Katie Paterson - What Do Artists Do All Day





- poster for my show in Japan has now gone live into the world. 

- been attending the outside cinema at the Holborn organised by our local independent cinema in Bath. There is something about these kind of experiences I really like. 









picture of crystals found on pinterest

Saturday 6 August 2016

of late









-  few favourites on instagram I like to follow. ashley helvey, nodi rugs, both have a certain aesthetic. Both have a very distinctive colour palette that I like. 

- went to London and visited 5 exhibitions, Bowie at Sotheby's, David Hockney portraits, Summer Exhibition, Georgia O'keeffe and the new section of the Tate. Each had its elements I liked, but my favourite was the new building of the Tate Modern. The building itself, not the art work in it, I thought the art was awful. But the building was seamless, I loved the alcoves where you could sit drink tea and look out the large windows. 

- talking of tea, I love that in Bath we have Comins tea. They have so much wisdom on their product. Also I covet everything in there, from their glasses to their tables they got made by Litton furniture

- favourite song at the moment: Strange weather by Anna Calvi. I wish I could sing like her. 








pinterest

Thursday 4 August 2016

finding balance










I have produced no work lately because I have been on the battle field. All my time is taken up fighting. Fighting to get my ideas across, fighting for my studio, fighting for my art work to stop being copied etc. I am exhausted. It also doesn't put me in the right frame of mind to work. I think while I spend all this time painting this lovely scroll I am sure a few months later I will post up an image of another artist who has completely ripped me off. It is the upsetting truth which is repeated throughout history. 
Now onwards, to think how I will come back from this point. I have decided to limit my energy output on to other projects other than my own. I will no longer do collaborations, favours, free work for publicity etc. What I have learnt is it doesn't grow you it weakens you. And this is not me being bitter, it is me deciding what is best for myself, my art. 

Commissions are different someone employing you for your uniqueness and employing you for what you already do. I have worked with some amazing people and companies on commissions. And they just flow as its balanced. And this is what it comes down to balance. My balance has been off with my self I will admit with all the projects I have on I have spread myself to thin. I need to come back to myself and recenter and this is how I see it happening. 







a well traveled woman 

Sunday 31 July 2016

development










I have been spending the last couple of weeks, rebranding myself no obvious change just yet, more of a slower burner development stage I am in right now. In preparation for my new show next year and my studio. A bit like developing a capsule wardrobe for yourself so you have to think less about what to wear each day you can focus on the things that need more energy. 
It has been tricky to create work for myself with everything that has been going on in work and personal life. I do feel very positive for the next stage. Writing down phrases to stick to for my next block of work. I feel flowers to me is what geometric shapes are to Sean Scully its a way of expressing yourself. I was saying to my potter friend who I am creating work with that, I may be paintings flowers on the pots now but I think eventually the shapes of the flower will be pure movement in the end. 







Games room in Landmark Trust property Monkton Old Hall in Pembroke 

Thursday 21 July 2016

of late










- started the ball rolling for my 5 year plan for buying my own land to build on. Firmly in my intentions  making a mood board. pinterest where would I be without you!

- the proms opened with the The BBC Symphony Orchestra playing La Marseillaise, France's national anthem, to a packed Royal Albert Hall.

- I have always been drawn to Andy Goldsworthy work. When watching him I find him such a true artist. It is all about he philosophy, inspiration and passion you have for what you do. Never during this video to you feel like he is lost in his work or that its all a big con. What he says about his red stone piece just opened my eyes, to how everything is connected. 

- off to see David Bowies private collection at Sotheby's soon. Watch the little video they created for it. So influenced by this man and how he found inspiration. 







bridget bardot
SaveSave

Sunday 17 July 2016

of late










- I watched the film Paddington this week and its the most imaginative children's film I have seen since spirited away. And the comic timing was brilliant! 

- Saw on arts nights spotlights on contenders for museum of the year, and for the first time discovered the sculpture park Jupiter Artland looks fantastic! First time discovering Anya Gallacio her piece 'the light pours through me' has a spiritual quality to it because of the mass of Amethyst.

- looking forward to the BFG. Thank god for Roald Dahl stories otherwise I wouldn't of read as a child. And Mark Rylance is someone I admire, he has a subtly and knowledge.

- was my sisters wedding yesterday at the Talbot Inn in Mells. and they just smashed it! out of the park service and food, such a perfect day. 

- I have a girl crush on Jessica Kamm think she has a really brilliant aesthetic and approach to business and life. I also want her house and wardrobe. 









pinterest (i think instagram grau) 

Tuesday 12 July 2016

honesty










I often get told that I am a very intense person. I don't see it, I see passion and drive. And the person calling me intense or dramatic, is probably unaware what passion feels like. There is something to be said for the miss use of words at the moment. My personal theory is because we have forgotten how to feel properly how to truly be ourselves and speak our truth. I feel like a drama queen a lot of the time amongst groups of people because if someone asks, 'so whats going on with you these days' I will tell them. I wont hide behind my white picket fence and say its all peaches and cream chum. I will say what is going on that day, that might be the best day or might be an ordinary day or it might be a fucking shit day. Either way i am telling them my story. How are stories created? its through life! 
You don't read books about people having conversations on where is the best place to buy organic veg, or what funny thing your pet did the other day.  
Communicating properly is fundamental otherwise we would of been created to be mute! all animals communicate in someway. That is how you learn things, how you are shaped as a person. 
I am on my soap box about this because it is bugging me. We have got into this stiffling environment.

My views though are about to change. I was reading an interview with Hockney in Tatler and it is the same interview, which I have seen in the last 5 magazines. Smoking, being gay in bradford, Los Angles, how long he works. I admire this man a lot for his artwork but for someone who says he is so outspoken doesn't really seem to be. What is going on? Another person I admired was David Bowie I was devastated when he died, but he was incredibly private, and well known for that. They both have privacy in common could this  be a protection method? I guess so, I talk a lot about my private life to my friends as a way of differing from my artwork as that is my true private life, I don't want peoples thoughts on it. After recent events in my life, I feel I  have to become more like my idols and be more private. As its starting to affect me I thought as above it was great to share, but when people don't you feel very lonely in your honesty. And this loneliness has lead to vulnerability, and people can be cruel. 

I have other stories to tell, as I am a constant explorer of culture, maybe these are the stories I am meant to be sharing. 








acrylic on paper, Diana Jahns, E.M. Galerie, Drachten, Nederland.

Monday 11 July 2016

freedom










Since the move of the studio I have become very self aware of myself. I underestimated the effect it would have on me the separation of my creative place and all my work being stored in different locations.
It was the one thing of mine that I felt attached to, was my commitment. Everything else in my life is someone else's 'thing.' House I live in is my mums, part time job is someone else's vision. I know this is why I am having doubts about setting up my own building on someone else's land. As the building will be mine but still doesn't give me that 100% freedom. Then it was a eureka moment everything to me that is important is about freedom, and I only doubt myself when my freedom starts to get taken away from me. Probably why I have been dreaming of far off countries like the desert, everything is wild there. The Australian outback a harsh land but beautiful at the same time. I have always been drawn to it, to ride wild horses, to swim in the outdoors. 
I have this dream because I know it will come true. But your dreams always tell you something. I am dreaming of freedom, how do I create my own freedom? Firstly I know I have it and its not something that can be created or be taken away, freedom is in your soul. Thats why I think people get confused when they think of their job, relationships etc as encroaching on their freedom. Its your doubts and fear and monotony that chisels away at it. 
You got to look at your doubts as if it was a fierce animal standing in front of you, and how do you choose to face it? I know that someday in the future I will buy my own plot of land to build on, move the studio I will build in September onto it as well,  and then it will be my own little piece of wild. 
I see other artists have done this, Georgia O'keeffe had ghost ranch, the bloomsbury group had Charleston. And I suppose I have reached that same stage now that I know the reason behind these artists homes. 







pinterest

Saturday 9 July 2016

of late









- found this video through free and native. Going to have to watch it few times to get it to sink in but there is some very interesting advice to be learned. re programming yourself to break habits to let in new thoughts. 

- I like these " rules for life" very much. Found on a piece apart blog. 
1. Be comfortable in the discomfort – change is on the horizon and it will inevitably take you somewhere interesting. 
2. If you’re stuck, get up and leave – the answer usually is not within the room you are sitting. 
3. If there is any ounce of initial doubt, linger there for a moment and explore it. There is a reason it exists. 
4. If a piece is not singing to you, don’t be afraid of wiping the page clean and starting again. You learned from the experience, but you don’t need the paper to record it.

- I have put my postcards and tape I made at a lower price on etsy. Purely as I am going to discontinue the line because I want to make room in my studio and not have to buy special sized envelopes anymore that take up more room. that is all. 

- Richard Tuttle, artists are like clouds. I agree with some but not all he says. 

- my friend showed me an old catalogue of shaker furniture. I loved the honey coloured wood. Defiantly want to get my hands on something shaker for my studio, I find it very pleasing to look at. 

- the pottery collaboration is still underway, and I might of turned it all on its head. the tests we created are beautiful but it needs more something? so I have been looking at pictures of Lucie Rie. But it is hard to find things out about her, no videos or documentaries. why is this?






agnes martin

Monday 4 July 2016

of late











- some of the free people videos are quite cheesy but I have always liked this road trip one with erin Wasson. 

- I regretted not going up to see the Agnes Martin exhibition at the Tate modern. I just didn't know  about her. And now I adore her work and her philosophy. There are brilliant documentaries about her on You tube. Watch what she has to say, its so honest. 

- Georgia O'keefe. I like her work but I like how she moved to the desert and adapted her work to life out there. I will go see her show at the Tate Modern, even if I think £19 entry is very steep. 

- came across this beautiful piece of music. Umrika Village - Dustin O'Halloran

- listening to Tracks by Robyn Davidson on audio book, while traveling at the moment. It is a great story, fuels my desire to go to the outback.

- i posted this quote up on my instagram from the book into the wild. This quote to me sums up the only way I live, and where happiness exists. 







anish kapoor

Wednesday 29 June 2016

of late









- had my hair cut lately looks like the photo above. 

- video of the installation of Clare Twomey’s Manifest: 10,000 Hours. addictive to watch.

- obsessed with the Australian outback, or arid landscapes in general. Also like looking at pictures of Joshua tree which isn't to far from Los angles. Maybe its because it is the opposite of rain we have here, or it is the dream of escapism.

- I respect the opinions of the art critic Waldemar Januszczak who writes in the times. I always think he gives a grounded opinion. And he is open minded without being sucked into hype of the artwork he may be looking at. He writes for the Times and I always read his column in the Culture supplement. I found out about another interesting abstract painter who was way before her time  Georgiana Houghton. 

- watched the film zootopia last night. yes its disney, yes I loved it. 

- why can't we get nice planters over in the uk? always so standard. Lusting over the ones sold by garden objects. especially the ones made by anchor ceramics. Garden objects instagram is a favourite of mine to follow, she finds so many interesting garden related things to post up.

- want to work with these people on something. Love their photography and mid century pieces.







pinterest


Saturday 25 June 2016

grow










the last 24 hours have been very strange the atmosphere feels heavy I thought it was a storm that was coming not brexit. the current of panic in the air is making everyone very nervous. I am not nervous, all I think, this is change. Britain has faced so much before, this is just another thing to face. And I believe we have faced worse. I look at my grandparents who have seen wars, cities bombed and friends die. And yes this is a nation divided in opinion, but it is the money world that will be unstable the most, but it is always unstable, everything all the time is unstable. Everything I have ever known in my life has changed in one way it is about having a positive attitude to what has changed. Things can't go back, no matter how much you wish it. I never wish to not of gone out with the man who was abusive to me, as it  has made me a stronger person as i know I had the strength to stand up to him. I never wish I didn't get my ski accident that left me with seizures because I now have my love of gardening because of it, as I spent my recovery gardening. Its not the shit that happens to you its what you do after it is what matters. 

If you want to comment make it positive. Having a positive outlook in the dark times is what will see you through. 







Elizabeth gilbert quote

Thursday 23 June 2016

studio








Studio, studio , studio. That is literally all I talk about at the moment. I don't want to talk or focus on anything else right now. The moment I stop I think about how the guys I share the studio with are being shits making me move for a month and a half only to move back to the same plot in September.   Reasons behind it because one of them needs the space to store his home stuff while he moves house, regardless that I rent it. Also because they can. It is a hard thing to digest disappointment in a person. But as usual I found a quote to sum up this life event. 

"people will show you who they are, but we ignore it because 
we want them to be who we want them to be." 
Don Draper

I am defiantly aware of how there is a bubbling anger in me right now ready to kick off. Where would it get me? probably worse off not having my studio on the land at all. So my obsession for stage 2 is so strong at the moment to deflect the anger into being over productive. I am moving out sooner than was discussed because I can't work surrounded by people who have lied. Along with the anger has come a great process. I am always one for clearing the clutter, but this time I have nowhere to store it I have had to be ruthless on what I take with me. I always looked at photos of minimalist studios and thought that is not a studio! Now I know its just a person who has had to move all the time! Or that they realised you really don't need that much stuff. 
I was a true art hoarder for years keeping every scrap of work, paintbrush, bits of materials etc just in case that project would come about that I might need that little square of blue paper....
Now all I am taking is a selection of books, my plan chest, 3 paintbrushes and ink. There will be other stuff eventually but it will be a small space again I will be moving into. 

Yesterday I picked the crystal moss agate, healing properties are:
Moss Agate is a stone of new beginnings. Balances the emotions, releasing fear and stress.  Encourages trust and hope.







pinterest

of late








- rekindled my love of Moby, play his music all day long.

- watched the film Eddie the Eagle. Main reason for watching.. I have a huge crush on Hugh Jackman. Must point out though the content of the film is right up my street also. Never giving up no matter how many obstacles get in your way. 

- uploaded everything I have painted lately onto etsy. I really like to sell on there it is so uncomplicated and accessible. 

- bought the book Spirit by Dan Pearson. To give me some inspiration for the garden I am going to surround my studio with. I also love the way he writes. 

- article about Margaret Howells home. Minimalism goals. 








milk decoration

Thursday 16 June 2016

new adventures and new chapters










Literally just came back from holiday and feel the need to write. As I want to capture this moment. My week break couldn't of come at a better time to press pause. I felt while I was away to write down every little thought that popped in my head to get it out of my system. Also I had my phone switched off the whole time so all thoughts were my own. 
I came to the conclusion that I will invest in the studio, I read the book Yoga Girl by Rachel Brathen while I was away and there is a chapter about love over fear. Talks about the things that scare you build you to your most important parts of your life. Each time you overcome something that feels scary at the time it just keeps moving you forward. 
The other thing that made me decide to go ahead with the studio was because I want to be able to travel more, so by building my own place I don't have huge over heads like I would if I was renting. when I say traveling its not the usual strap a back pack on and do the gap year circuit. I want to explore culture.  Just 4 days in a new place once and a while. Put the breaks on my self employed life, refreshes my outlooks and gain new inspiration. Staying in places like Casa Modesta which was where I stayed in Portugal the place attracted cultured people to, I made new friends, and the place itself was just an overflowing source of creative details. One of the people I met there told me about a website where you can go stay in similar unique places across the globe.
 New adventures and new chapters. 








erin wasson in so it goes magazine 

Tuesday 7 June 2016

fall or fly








You know that time when everything in your life is just a little quite, you sleep at night, you have a rhythm going. And then boom! you get blind sided. That happened to me last week with good and bad elements. I have had, very large commissions in which is wonderful but everything needs to be done within a week, along with all the other work that I am doing. Its exciting but wow it pushes you. 
So I was already stretched mentally when I arrive at my studio and the guys I share the barn with decided they need the space back. It was a blow because I have worked in this place for a year and a half now, made it my own invested in it. It became my sanctuary. So to have it taken away it was crushing. However I knew it was coming so that is why I had been looking for a new place. I didn't like having my studio under the roof of someone else rules, it never sat right with me, never felt like I could be truly free. So being chucked out before my new space was sorted, just made me think thank god I had started this looking process.

Even though I question my next step to put down roots on this farmers land literally a stone throws away from where I am now. I will be investing every penny I have to buy and customise a garden office. Its a panic because again you are putting your dreams into someone else's hands and they could take it away from you at any minute. I suppose though you have got to trust in the power of contracts. And as I live most of my life by Peter Pan quotes:
"What if I fall? Oh, but my darling what if you fly?"
I am praying I fly. 








pinterest


this week, and a bit about phone calls.









- best song I am listening to at the moment : California dreamin' by Amason

-I am researching patterns for the project I am working with Esme Winter on. they directed me to look at Cooper Hewitt archive. I mean wow! this archive is incredible 3 hours at a time has passed looking through this site.

- I have been scanning all my latest works in to sell on etsy. It takes a couple of days and is very boring. So been working my way through mad men series. I have always loved this programme but never got round to watching the last season. I found the last episode needed a little more explaining. And came across this wonderful interview with the creator
He just tells Peggy, just move forward — that's his philosophy in life." (about Don Draper)
another extract from interview:
"Person to Person" has a personal meaning. The final episode's title refers to the three phone calls Don has with the three women in his life — Sally, Betty and Peggy — but Weiner said it's also about the phone itself. "A lot of the most important things in my life have happened to me over the phone," he said, remember that before texting and voicemails, "It's a dramatic situation almost every time when you answer the phone ­— if you answer the phone."

I agree phone calls are about bravery these days. In my quest to master any fears/worries that come my way, which could be hidden behind email or texting tennis. I just pick up the phone, hear the voice, connect. We already don't have enough face time with people I believe voice time shouldn't be cut out either. 







cooper hewitt archive