Thursday, 31 December 2015

sum up

I have never been fond of new years. For reasons that I feel it is a forced day. A night where you must have the best night of your life! And in my stubbornness and my basic instinct not to follow the crowd. I would prefer to go to bed at 8 and not stay up till 12 just to make a point, even though most nights I do stay up past that time. I have found these special dates now highlight factors what we are missing in our lives. 
New years - a social life, valentines day - a significant other, christmas - grandeur. 

Then again it really boils down to wether you care what other people are thinking or doing. I don't really care for either. Unless I am really tired then I am fucked, I will be sensitive and will care. This resulting in lately spending so much time making my room a paradise for sleep, so the doubt doesn't creep in. 

What I do like about new years is the gratitude people are throwing around for things that have happened to them for the year just gone. And I thought what am I grateful for? and to be honest I am grateful for myself.  
I just deleted a whole section I wrote on why I am grateful, and the trials and tribulations I have faced this year to get me to this point. It really is simple though I am tough little shit and always have been, and I congratulate myself for always pushing through the obstacles, the ones that people put in my way, and the ones I put there myself. 

'"you are so used to your features, you don't know how beautiful you look to a stranger". 
quote unknown

there is something in that quote, that sums up my year for me what I have learnt, grown and how far I have come. 


Saturday, 26 December 2015

new habits

I sit at my desk in my room where I type out these posts. And there are pieces of paper stuck up everywhere, some lists to do, or sayings like 'Don't stop beleiving'. Then little sketches of nudes, or ideas that I might be working on. And then the desk itself is covered in wall paint testers, hand creams, plants, pens, inks, christmas cards I am yet to write. This is just one corner of my room! yet it feels that it encroaches on my mind, this busyness this hub of activity of things yet to accomplish and explore. No wonder I feel I can't get one cohesive idea out at the moment. 
My friend told me that she wasn't going to buy anything new for 2016. I was shocked by this statement, thinking how will she manage that? 
Since she told me about this a few months ago I have been thinking how I would like to adapt this to my lifestyle. Firstly to stop buying things, and with that urge I have to buy something buy an experience instead. For example workshops at yoga bodhi, a spa day, a talk, cinema tickets. Become eager to find experiences as much as I am to find something to buy. I sound like a recovering shopaholic, but I am not, I don't even like going 'shopping' I have just lived in the same place for all my life and pretty much kept everything. I have always lived by the mentality, buy well, you buy once. Consequence nothing has really broken or gone out of date style wise. And my body shape hasn't ever changed so my clothes for the past decade still fit me. I can't say I will not buy a piece of clothing next year, as I am still finding what I want to say with my clothes. self expression through what you choose to wear I feel is important it sets a mood for yourself and that day. And even when you get the people who say they don't care what they wear thats still an expression. 
What I am hoping to get out of this, is a richer way of life. Literally richer, but also culturally richer. 


Thursday, 24 December 2015

this week

-I adored the new star wars film. Very empowering to have a woman hero, and have her be so at ease with it. The soundtrack by John Williams is great to listen to, scavenger is my favourite track.
-Film 2015 had some good points. I try to watch this each week as i like Claudia Winklemans view of films. If she likes them i tend to go watch it.
-picking colours for my room from little greens grey collection. Got my eye on Inox, french grey and a dash of soot.
- obsessing over Lily Vanilli and the Meringue girls instagram accounts for my pavlova I am making for Christmas Day.
- visiting the Victoria art gallery to take in the art. I could fall asleep in an art gallery doesn't matter how many people are there, just get lost in the pictures. I would love to get my hands on this place and shake it up though.
- died at the 108 sun salutes class at Yoga Bodhi for the winter solstice. Still feeling the effects now from it. What I mean from effects is my legs I can barely move, but also the repetition of the moves forced clearance of all you think about in the mind was incredible. All those niggling thoughts just got pushed away.
- feeling festive looking at the photos of the state apartments at Windsor Castle. So much tradition and dedication, I love it.

John Constable - Summer Evening with Storm Clouds

Wednesday, 23 December 2015

reith lectures

I dedicate this post to my friend Lucy G who I want to listen to the Grayson Perry Reith lectures.
I must of listened to them about 5 times now, so candid about the art world and his craft its so refreshing and funny! 

Édouard Boubat, Portuguese Woman, 1957

winter solstice

Winter Solstice is the longest night of the year it is also the transitioning point when each day draws in more and more light. A time a rebirth for nature and new energy. Solstice means Sun stands still, it is a moment when the Sun stops moving southward, pauses, before it begins to move northward. It is a moment of pause in the darkness before the rebirth of light (both in nature and your inner light as well). It is as much a time about rebirth as it is a time of wonder. 
(description from Sphinx and the milky way

On this winter solstice day I popped out and did this little ritual. On one piece of paper I wrote down all the things I wanted to leave behind in this year. This varied from emotions, thought patterns and peoples actions that have left me upset. And then on the other piece of paper I wrote down what I wanted to come in for the new year. This wasn't a wish list like, I want a mini cooper... that was in the letter I wrote to father Christmas ;) . It was more of the thoughts and feelings I want to bring in, like inspiration, clarity and strength. So the first letter I burnt up the chimney (might be going to father Christmas after all) to symbolise these energies being transmuted into creative passion for the adventure to come. And the other you are meant to bury, I picked a piece of rosemary as its the only herb really flourishing at this time of the year and it has holistic properties for healing, and as what i was wishing for was partly healing, it felt right. I put the rosemary and paper in a hole in the ground next to where I grow my Rhubarb. I picked this spot as, rhubarb is one of the first things to send out growth in the darkness of winter. And as the solstice is about light through the dark, again felt right and rather poetic. 

I have always been spiritual mainly through my extreme curiosity to learn things. And then the other came from when I had been ill for so long, trying to figure out a way to get better as the doctors couldn't. You start to reach out to other branches. It is like pandoras box, but a pandoras box you don't want to shut. 

I am quite particular about the spiritual websites I read
Here are some websites that have some posts about the solstice: 
- winter wellness guide, more about honouring yourself in the winter then solstice

Peter Lanyon

Sunday, 20 December 2015

this week

this week I have had a nasty cough/cold think the stress and tiredness of the show finally caught up on me. Only a few things to mention this week, as the cold and work have taken over for now. 

- I am allergic to doctors so I go to Neals yard for my wellness supplies. Been taking their Hot Lung mix, drinking inner strength tea and using the Arnica Salve to help with seizing up muscles. 

- watching the secret history of the British garden. Completely captivating. Writing down the locations so I now have a list to visit next year. 

- treated me and my mother to a spa day at Lucknam park. Because I love her and we both needed a day off, and when you spend that kind of money you sort of owe it to your self to absorb the gentle and relaxing energy of the place. The treatments are very holistic, a lot to do with chakras and working with the individual. There I discovered the brand Ila, and the body cream for vital energy, most gorgeous product. 

- started a children + enfant board on pinterest, I have seen so many wonderful little boutiques opening lately for children gear, they have really inspired me. Children's stuff is so creative and has the most wonderful colour palettes. 

Eames mid century wooden toys

1st of January

On the first of January I like to do something I have called my smug run. I don't go running any other time of the year other than new years day. Two reasons I like to be a smug twat running about, look at me and my health, while most people have a hangover.  And the other is symbolic, to run on this day I feel you are shedding the old, not running away from what has gone before but instead leaving it behind you, and moving on. 

There are things I would like to bring into my year of 2016

- hug more. I think it is an understated quality. 

- sign off emails with best wishes.  It is a warmer approach.

- go for the different thing on the menu. Nice little way of implementing change.

- more yoga. Once a week isn't cutting it, there is so much to be explored in yoga.

- change my room. I am determined to make 2016 the year of good sleep and changing my room will help. I am sitting on a mountain of stuff, which adds to the clutter in the mind. 

- explore Britain. 

- make time for miscellaneous things

- stop blaming myself for everything. this is more of an ongoing saga, but they say to break a habit it can be done in 40 days. 

I will expand on these points in future blog posts. 

Imi Knoebel, 1977

Friday, 18 December 2015


I like this line out of an email I got about a blog post I deleted.

Even optimists need to blow off steam sometimes and I guess being an optimist isn’t about not acknowledging difficulties but about how you face those difficulties.

Lampe Andre Cazenave coquillage shell

Thursday, 17 December 2015

change is afoot

I have been very restless for some time now, not just the past week but for a couple years now. Like how travel enthusiasts get itchy feet to travel, I get this overwhelming sense to change to grow and explore. I don't need travel to open my eyes to new things, for me it is creating something within myself that is new. Changing the system. And as I am in the art world it has been my senses telling me something needs to change. 
A pinnacle moment happened to me yesterday, I went up to meet with a gallery who had already bought 11 of my pieces from the recent show, and had expressed interest in taking me on for their gallery. I was too excited, they are a fine art gallery with amazing credentials, it was such a compliment to be coming up to see them tears had been shed because of excitement. So when I was there thinking I was showing pieces for them to take it on, I was met with the usual I am worried it is a risk you have no name for yourself, you haven't been doing this for very long, you need to master your art form more.  All fair enough comments, they are a business and have over heads can't take a risk incase it effects them. Too be honest I thought this was too good to be true that I would be excepted at this gallery. But why buy my art then? it must not be down to the art, Maybe being unknown? this isn't the first time I have heard this, I got told this by Christopher Farr he wouldn't collaborate because I didn't have a name. 
So what do you do when you have the work the art is better than good for big players to reach out to you, but again no name... apart from bang your head on the wall out of frustration. I walked round London the rest of the day deep in thought and said to myself do I actually need these people? not out of spite, but do I really need a gallery to sell my work for me?
We are in a new world these days social media is massive, I have double the amount of followers on social media then that particular gallery. And even one of their famous clients have now bought from me seeking me out in Stroud of all places, not London. All via my online presence I have. I put on my own show, I framed my work, I contacted buyers, did my own press, and I have an international client base. Yes I know my art of business needs refining, but I mustn't forget i have done this all by myself. Never taught, learning in a small space of time and I proved I can do it. 
One thing the gallery owner said, yes you may have big people buying your artwork, but they aren't exactly in the art world. But I have thought long on this comment because it niggles at me that why haven't the art world looked at me? 
I haven't gone through the usual levels to become a qualified artist, have you done an artists residency, no, did you study fine art, no are you represented by a gallery, no. Then you get a shuffle of disapproval, she doesn't know what she is doing. 
I know what I am doing I am painting, I am painting from my heart, my style, my emotions. And I do have a name for myself it is LUCY AUGE. I promise you now that this art world is changing and I will carry on doing what I am doing regardless if these set people feel I am worthy of being excepted to a group. As long as there are people who love my art and want to buy it, that makes me an artist. 
I am going to take a break for the winter not from painting but from trying so hard and blossom in spring where I am planning a new way for myself, no art gallery, no art dealer, something better. 

Charles Hippolyte Aubry, Poppies, 1864

Friday, 11 December 2015

this week

-Watching a tv series about the spectrum of colour on the BBC. My favourite part has been the bit about why leaves are green. 
- Listening to the Northern Lights by Philip Pullman on Audible, while I work in the studio. I have listened to this since I was 13 and I never get bored of it. It is in my top 5 favourite books. Unfortunately that means very little as I have only read about 10 books in my entire lifetime. 
- Invested in a Norwegian storm blanket. It wasn't that much as I got it at the outlet shop. Probably bought it because of listening to the Northern Lights. 
- going to a winter wonderland in Stroud tomorrow. Full of artisan makers!
- general obsession starting for dreams of traveling to Russia! 

In the grove of the temple of Isis (Détail) 
John William Godward 1915

Saturday, 5 December 2015

this week

- went to see the bridge of spies last night. There is something comforting about a Spielberg film. Quote from the movie;
Rudolf Abel: This one time, I was at the age of your son, our house is overrun by partisan boarder guards. Dozen of them. My father was beaten, my mother was beaten, and this man, my father's friend, he was beaten. And I watched this man. Every time they hit him, he stood back up again. Soldier hit him harder, still he got back to his feet. I think because of this they stopped the beating and let him live... "Stoikiy muzhik". Which sort of means like a "standing man"... Standing man...

- day trip with my fellow artist friend Ruth Ainsworth to Stroud to drop off our work to the pop up shop Nothing but Navy. All items in there are Navy (clue is in the name), so 6 of my Navy ink drawings have gone there to be displayed and sold.

- got myself a Himalayan Salt lamp, been wanting one for ages.

- obsessed with watching season 2 of Fargo. This is the tv I love, script is excellent and every still could be a picture and it has Kirsten Dunst who is on top form.

- booking in on yoga workshops at yoga bodhi the other studio I work at. How amazing do these workshops sound! I am so excited for everyone of these. I got told to book things that bring you joy far in advance, so you always have something to look forward to. So when things go tits up for a bit you always have something good on the horizon.

108 Sun Salutations & Chanting For Winter Solstice With Simona

The Lost Art of Fermentation and probiotic Foods with Nicola Clarke & Paul Haenel

Mark Rothko, c.1947


This week I have been busy sorting out my studio again. Bringing back all the paintings and the things that go with the show. It is floor to ceiling mess! I am looking forward to seeing it all clear, the paintings archived in a filing cabinet, and the floor looking clean and not covered in dirt and dried flowers. I am happy because I did get round to uploading the postcards and postcard packs from the exhibition on to Etsy. I was pleased with the turn out of these postcards, I wanted to imitate how the Tate and other major galleries have postcards from the show on sale. When I have less to upload of the paintings I will put them onto etsy but for now all can be seen on my website and I can be contacted to purchase, £40 per painting.

own photo

Tuesday, 1 December 2015

learnings, lessons

I wrote a long negative post right now and deleted it, because I saw this post on instagram:
'The Universe only gives you what you can handle'
Comment under said: 

'When I look back at all the most challenging things I've had to overcome they are the things that taught me the most about myself & life. Even though the lessons, learnings & letting goes may have not been enjoyable at the time a great strength & wisdom developed out of them. Dig deep my friends & know that what doesn't kill you always makes you stronger as my mum always said to me growing up '

My first post had said I was hoping for the universe to send me a sign to how to get out of this stressful situation I am in, and sure enough this came up. It was the right message at the right time.This situation has taught me that I am too much of a pushover, and don't speak out at the beginning. I am outspoken but I let too many things slide from the start, for benefit of the doubt, and end up speaking up at the end when it just looks desperate and angry. I read this article about setting boundaries and I keep re-reading it hoping it will sink in. 

If you don't read the whole article read this, (but I do recommend you read the artcile): 
'Setting boundaries isn’t about throwing up walls and creating cold and calculated distance. This practice is about learning to give yourself the space you need in each moment to stand tall and love the people in your life exactly as they are. Setting boundaries is about knowing your limits, asking for what you need and taking a moment of pause before reacting.'

Claude Monet : "Glaçons sur la Seine à Bougival, dit Neige sur la rivière"